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fortune is outdated with wrong format .dat files #197548

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twang2218 opened this issue Nov 13, 2024 · 6 comments
Open
4 tasks done

fortune is outdated with wrong format .dat files #197548

twang2218 opened this issue Nov 13, 2024 · 6 comments
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bug Reproducible Homebrew/homebrew-core bug

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@twang2218
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twang2218 commented Nov 13, 2024

brew gist-logs <formula> link OR brew config AND brew doctor output

> brew gist-logs fortune
Error: No logs.

> brew config
HOMEBREW_VERSION: 4.4.5
ORIGIN: https://github.com/Homebrew/brew
HEAD: 254bf3fe9d8fa2e1b2fb55dbcf535b2d870180c4
Last commit: 2 days ago
Core tap JSON: 13 Nov 04:54 UTC
Core cask tap JSON: 13 Nov 04:54 UTC
HOMEBREW_PREFIX: /opt/homebrew
HOMEBREW_CASK_OPTS: []
HOMEBREW_MAKE_JOBS: 8
Homebrew Ruby: 3.3.6 => /opt/homebrew/Library/Homebrew/vendor/portable-ruby/3.3.6/bin/ruby
CPU: octa-core 64-bit arm_firestorm_icestorm
Clang: 16.0.0 build 1600
Git: 2.46.1 => /opt/homebrew/bin/git
Curl: 8.7.1 => /usr/bin/curl
macOS: 15.0.1-arm64
CLT: 16.0.0.0.1.1724870825
Xcode: 16.1
Rosetta 2: false

> brew doctor
Your system is ready to brew.

Verification

What were you trying to do (and why)?

I tried to use fortune-zh from the Ubuntu repo for Homebrew's fortune to provide Chinese fortune cookies. However, I found that fortune cannot use these files.

The fortune cookie file is divided into two parts: one part is a plain text file, and the other part is an index file with metadata (named with the same name and a .dat suffix).

After a detailed analysis of the source code of fortune, I noticed that Homebrew used the old fortune source code, which resulted in errors in the format of the provided files.

We take art.dat, which is available in both Homebrew and Ubuntu, as an example:

hexdump -C homebrew-fortune-9708/art.dat | head 
00000000  00 00 00 01 00 00 00 00  00 00 01 cc 00 00 00 00  |................|
00000010  00 00 06 11 00 00 00 00  00 00 00 10 00 00 00 00  |................|
00000020  00 00 00 00 00 00 00 00  25 00 00 00 00 00 00 00  |........%.......|
00000030  00 00 00 00 00 00 00 00  00 00 01 21 00 00 00 00  |...........!....|
hexdump -C ubuntu-fortunes_1.99.1-7.3build2_all/art.dat| head
00000000  00 00 00 02 00 00 01 d1  00 00 06 11 00 00 00 10  |................|
00000010  00 00 00 00 25 00 00 00  00 00 00 00 00 00 01 21  |....%..........!|
00000020  00 00 01 ef 00 00 02 2e  00 00 06 00 00 00 06 6e  |...............n|
00000030  00 00 06 d0 00 00 07 17  00 00 07 82 00 00 08 18  |................|

We can see that the .dat file provided by homebrew has data in 64-bit, 00 00 00 01 00 00 00 00, while in Ubuntu it is in 32-bit, 00 00 00 01.

We further examine the corresponding source code, where the original version 9708 used by Homebrew defines the header of its .dat file as:

typedef struct {				/* information table */
#define	VERSION		1
	unsigned long	str_version;		/* version number */
	unsigned long	str_numstr;		/* # of strings in the file */
	unsigned long	str_longlen;		/* length of longest string */
	unsigned long	str_shortlen;		/* length of shortest string */
#define	STR_RANDOM	0x1			/* randomized pointers */
#define	STR_ORDERED	0x2			/* ordered pointers */
#define	STR_ROTATED	0x4			/* rot-13'd text */
	unsigned long	str_flags;		/* bit field for flags */
	unsigned char	stuff[4];		/* long aligned space */
#define	str_delim	stuff[0]		/* delimiting character */
} STRFILE;

The corresponding version in Ubuntu is:

typedef struct {				/* information table */
#define	VERSION		2
	u_int32_t	str_version;		/* version number */
	u_int32_t	str_numstr;		/* # of strings in the file */
	u_int32_t	str_longlen;		/* length of longest string */
	u_int32_t	str_shortlen;		/* length of shortest string */
#define	STR_RANDOM	0x1			/* randomized pointers */
#define	STR_ORDERED	0x2			/* ordered pointers */
#define	STR_ROTATED	0x4			/* rot-13'd text */
	u_int32_t	str_flags;		/* bit field for flags */
	u_int8_t	stuff[4];		/* long aligned space */
#define	str_delim	stuff[0]		/* delimiting character */
} STRFILE;

We can see that unsigned long has been changed to the platform-independent u_int32_t. I traced the modifications of this code back to the Debian version from the year 2000 9708-19, as well as the change made in FreeBSD on February 17, 2005, by Ruslan Ermilov [email protected] change, which explicitly mentioned the reason for the modification: the emergence of 64-bit systems made unsigned long incompatible with the earlier 32-bit systems, thus necessitating architecture-independent file format definitions.

Ruslan Ermilov [email protected] | 2005-02-17 18:06:37

Make the on-disk format of .dat files produced by strfile(8)
architecture independent. Besides the fixed-width types in
the header, the offsets are now stored as 64-bit off_t (also
in big endian format).

Tested on: i386, amd64, sparc64, ia64

Further observation of Homebrew's .dat file format reveals that it is not 64-bit Big Endian, but rather a peculiar method of padding back to 64 bits after truncating to 32 bits in Big Endian.

For example, if the first value is 1, it should be stored as [00 00 00 00 00 00 00 01] in BigEndian 64-bit format, but the version in Homebrew is [00 00 00 01 00 00 00 00]. After digging into the source code, the confusion is also due to the 64-bit format.

/*
 * add_offset:
 *      Add an offset to the list, or write it out, as appropriate.
 */
void add_offset(FILE * fp, off_t off)
{
    off_t net;

    if (!STORING_PTRS)
    {
	net = htonl(off);
	fwrite(&net, 1, sizeof net, fp);
    }
    else
    {
	ALLOC(Seekpts, Num_pts + 1);
	Seekpts[Num_pts] = off;
    }
    Num_pts++;
}

In this context, net is of type off_t, which is 64 bits on a 64-bit system, while htonl() processes 32-bit integers. Therefore, when net is passed to htonl(), the 64-bit value is truncated to a 32-bit value, resulting in only the low 32 bits being converted to Big Endian. When writing to file, the size is sizeof net, so the high 32 bits, which are zeros, of the 64-bit value are still included, leading to the strange format [00 00 00 01 00 00 00 00] found in the files provided by Homebrew.

The reason why there is no error when executing the fortune command is that both the code and data have gone wrong together, so there is no error now. However, whether we use the fortune from another system to call the cookie file provided by Homebrew, or when we use the fortune command provided by Homebrew to call the cookie from another system, errors will occur due to file format incompatibility.

Since this issue has been resolved for over 20 years, it is recommended that Homebrew upgrade fortune to a new version.

What happened (include all command output)?

❯ fortune ubuntu-fortunes-zh_1.98.1_deb/chinese | head -n 20
要有礼貌

在 Debian 这种规模的项目中,很难避免遇到与你意见不和,或者难以合作
的人。请接受这一事实,并保持礼貌。意见不一致并不是糟糕举止或者人身
攻击的借口,而且让人感觉受到威胁显然不是健康的社区氛围。

    -- Debian 《行为准则》第一条
%
善意推定

Debian 贡献者们可能会通过与您不一样的方式来达成我们对于自由操作
系统的共同目标。请始终假设其他人都在为这一目标而付诸努力。
需要注意的是,我们之中的许多贡献者的母语并不是英语,同时也可能
来自不同的文化背景。

    -- Debian 《行为准则》第二条
%
保持合作

Debian 是一个庞大而复杂的项目,这里永远会有需要学习的新知识。

As we can see, fortune failed to parse the chinese.dat file, and show all the content of chinese cookies, not one at a time.

What did you expect to happen?

❯ fortune ubuntu-fortunes-zh_1.98.1_deb/chinese
善意推定

Debian 贡献者们可能会通过与您不一样的方式来达成我们对于自由操作
系统的共同目标。请始终假设其他人都在为这一目标而付诸努力。
需要注意的是,我们之中的许多贡献者的母语并不是英语,同时也可能
来自不同的文化背景。

    -- Debian 《行为准则》第二条

Step-by-step reproduction instructions (by running brew commands)

Download any cookie file with .dat files from Ubuntu or other repo, and run fortune to the file.

fortune path/to/cookie
@twang2218 twang2218 added the bug Reproducible Homebrew/homebrew-core bug label Nov 13, 2024
@SMillerDev
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We're shipping the program as it's distributed by upstream. If upstream incorporates the patches in a new release we will automatically use those too.

@Bo98
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Bo98 commented Nov 13, 2024

Since this issue has been resolved for over 20 years, it is recommended that Homebrew upgrade fortune to a new version.

It's a bit complicated.

fortune is from NetBSD and in the late 90s there was a Linux port. Unfortunately that port is hasn't been updated in 27 years so has the issues you describe.

Debian ended up having their own fork, but it's a different version. The version 2 format is not strictly official - the NetBSD fortune updated today is still version 1.

The Debian version is somewhat dead too so there was another fork here from the older Debian version: https://github.com/shlomif/fortune-mod. However at this point it's very much detached from the original NetBSD fortune so there's a question whether it should really be updated in-place or be a separate formula. Most Linux distros have switched (with Debian/Ubuntu keeping their older fork), whereas most BSDs still retain their own version.

Interestingly, NetBSD did import the Linux port back in as a package: https://ftp.netbsd.org/pub/pkgsrc/current/pkgsrc/games/fortune/index.html. It's not updated really and is still based on the 90s version of the NetBSD native version, that still exists alongside this package. But it does have two patches that would help fix the issue you describe: https://github.com/NetBSD/pkgsrc/blob/trunk/games/fortune/patches/patch-fortune_fortune.c, https://github.com/NetBSD/pkgsrc/blob/trunk/games/fortune/patches/patch-util_strfile.h. This is probably as official as it gets.

@twang2218
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I checked the fortune versions of various operating systems.

Moreover, all the versions provided by these systems have fixed the issue I mentioned, so shouldn't Homebrew switch to an upstream that is still maintaining for fortune? Such as, switch to shlomif/fortune-mod?

@Bo98
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Bo98 commented Nov 13, 2024

Well you demonstrated there how there isn't really a single upstream anymore. There's like 6 there and they've all gone different directions.

But I agree that at the very least the NetBSD patches should be applied. Out of the rest, shlomif/fortune-mod does look the most promising though.

@twang2218
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twang2218 commented Nov 14, 2024

More information about fortune version and .dat format on major platforms, and compatibility test.

System, Version and Cookies .dat format

Ubuntu-24-04-x64

  • Install: sudo apt-get install -y fortune-mod
  • Version: 1:1.99.1-7.3build1
  • Picked cookies: /usr/share/games/fortunes/fortunes
root@ubuntu-24-04-x64:~# hexdump -C cookies/ubuntu-24/fortunes.dat | head
00000000  00 00 00 02 00 00 01 af  00 00 00 bb 00 00 00 0f  |................|
00000010  00 00 00 00 25 00 00 00  00 00 00 00 00 00 00 2b  |....%..........+|
00000020  00 00 00 60 00 00 00 8f  00 00 00 df 00 00 01 14  |...`............|
00000030  00 00 01 48 00 00 01 7c  00 00 01 ab 00 00 01 e6  |...H...|........|
00000040  00 00 02 20 00 00 02 3b  00 00 02 7a 00 00 02 c5  |... ...;...z....|
00000050  00 00 03 04 00 00 03 3d  00 00 03 68 00 00 03 a7  |.......=...h....|

Debian-12-x64

  • Install: sudo apt-get install -y fortune-mod
    • /usr/games/fortune
  • Version: 1:1.99.1-7.3
  • Picked cookies: /usr/share/games/fortunes/fortunes
root@debian-12-x64:~# hexdump -C cookies/debian/fortunes.dat | head
00000000  00 00 00 02 00 00 01 af  00 00 00 bb 00 00 00 0f  |................|
00000010  00 00 00 00 25 00 00 00  00 00 00 00 00 00 00 2b  |....%..........+|
00000020  00 00 00 60 00 00 00 8f  00 00 00 df 00 00 01 14  |...`............|
00000030  00 00 01 48 00 00 01 7c  00 00 01 ab 00 00 01 e6  |...H...|........|
00000040  00 00 02 20 00 00 02 3b  00 00 02 7a 00 00 02 c5  |... ...;...z....|
00000050  00 00 03 04 00 00 03 3d  00 00 03 68 00 00 03 a7  |.......=...h....|

Arch-linux

  • Install: sudo pacman -S fortune-mod
  • Version: 3.22.0-1
  • Pick cookies: /usr/share/fortune/fortunes
[root@arch-linux ~]# hexdump -C cookies/arch-linux/fortunes.dat | head
00000000  00 00 00 02 00 00 01 af  00 00 00 bb 00 00 00 0f  |................|
00000010  00 00 00 00 25 00 00 00  00 00 00 00 00 00 00 2b  |....%..........+|
00000020  00 00 00 60 00 00 00 8f  00 00 00 df 00 00 01 14  |...`............|
00000030  00 00 01 48 00 00 01 7c  00 00 01 ab 00 00 01 e6  |...H...|........|
00000040  00 00 02 20 00 00 02 3b  00 00 02 7a 00 00 02 c5  |... ...;...z....|
00000050  00 00 03 04 00 00 03 3d  00 00 03 68 00 00 03 a7  |.......=...h....|

Fedora-41-x64

  • Install: sudo dnf install -y fortune-mod
  • Version: 3.22.0-2.fc41
  • Picked cookies: /usr/share/games/fortunes/fortunes
[root@fedora-41-x64 ~]# hexdump -C cookies/fedora/fortunes.dat | head
00000000  00 00 00 02 00 00 01 af  00 00 00 bb 00 00 00 0f  |................|
00000010  00 00 00 00 25 00 00 00  00 00 00 00 00 00 00 2b  |....%..........+|
00000020  00 00 00 60 00 00 00 8f  00 00 00 df 00 00 01 14  |...`............|
00000030  00 00 01 48 00 00 01 7c  00 00 01 ab 00 00 01 e6  |...H...|........|
00000040  00 00 02 20 00 00 02 3b  00 00 02 7a 00 00 02 c5  |... ...;...z....|
00000050  00 00 03 04 00 00 03 3d  00 00 03 68 00 00 03 a7  |.......=...h....|

Alpine-3-20-x64

  • Install: apk add fortune
  • Version: 0.1-r3
  • cookies: /usr/share/fortune/fortunes
alpine:~# hexdump -C cookies/alpine/fortunes.dat | head
00000000  00 00 00 02 00 00 0d bb  00 00 08 62 00 00 00 0b  |...........b....|
00000010  00 00 00 00 25 00 00 00  00 00 00 00 00 00 00 25  |....%..........%|
00000020  00 00 01 6a 00 00 01 b8  00 00 02 0a 00 00 02 2f  |...j.........../|
00000030  00 00 03 27 00 00 03 c7  00 00 05 23 00 00 05 69  |...'.......#...i|
00000040  00 00 05 e2 00 00 05 ef  00 00 06 41 00 00 06 a2  |...........A....|
00000050  00 00 09 26 00 00 09 a8  00 00 0a 48 00 00 0b 3d  |...&.......H...=|

OpenSUSE-15-x64

  • Install: sudo zypper install -y fortune
  • Version: fortune-2.10.0-bp156.3.5.x86_64
  • cookies: /usr/share/fortune/fortunes
opensuse:~ # hexdump -C cookies/opensuse/fortunes.dat | head
00000000  00 00 00 02 00 00 01 af  00 00 00 bb 00 00 00 0f  |................|
00000010  00 00 00 00 25 00 00 00  00 00 00 00 00 00 00 2b  |....%..........+|
00000020  00 00 00 60 00 00 00 8f  00 00 00 df 00 00 01 14  |...`............|
00000030  00 00 01 48 00 00 01 7c  00 00 01 ab 00 00 01 e6  |...H...|........|
00000040  00 00 02 20 00 00 02 3b  00 00 02 7a 00 00 02 c5  |... ...;...z....|
00000050  00 00 03 04 00 00 03 3d  00 00 03 68 00 00 03 a7  |.......=...h....|

FreeBSD-14-x64

  • Install: base system
    • /usr/bin/fortune
  • cookies: /usr/share/games/fortune/freebsd-tips
root@freebsd-14:~ # hexdump -C cookies/freebsd-14/freebsd-tips.dat | head
00000000  00 00 00 01 00 00 00 8a  00 00 02 ea 00 00 00 27  |...............'|
00000010  00 00 00 08 25 00 00 00  00 00 00 00 00 00 00 00  |....%...........|
00000020  00 00 00 00 00 00 00 db  00 00 00 00 00 00 01 b0  |................|
00000030  00 00 00 00 00 00 02 09  00 00 00 00 00 00 02 d0  |................|
00000040  00 00 00 00 00 00 03 47  00 00 00 00 00 00 03 93  |.......G........|
00000050  00 00 00 00 00 00 04 18  00 00 00 00 00 00 05 96  |................|

OpenBSD-7-6

  • Install: base system
    • /usr/games/fortune
  • cookies: /usr/share/games/fortune/fortunes
openbsd-7-6# hexdump -C cookies/openbsd-7-6/fortunes.dat | head
00000000  00 00 00 02 00 00 0d ba  00 00 08 62 00 00 00 0b  |...........b....|
00000010  00 00 00 00 25 00 00 00  00 00 00 00 00 00 00 25  |....%..........%|
00000020  00 00 01 6a 00 00 01 b8  00 00 02 0a 00 00 02 2f  |...j.........../|
00000030  00 00 03 27 00 00 03 c7  00 00 05 23 00 00 05 69  |...'.......#...i|
00000040  00 00 05 e2 00 00 05 ef  00 00 06 41 00 00 06 a2  |...........A....|
00000050  00 00 09 26 00 00 09 a8  00 00 0a 48 00 00 0b 3d  |...&.......H...=|

Homebrew

  • Install: brew install fortune
  • cookies: $HOMEBREW_CELLAR/fortune/9708/share/games/fortunes/fortunes
hexdump -C cookies/homebrew/fortunes.dat | head
00000000  00 00 00 01 00 00 00 00  00 00 01 b1 00 00 00 00  |................|
00000010  00 00 00 bb 00 00 00 00  00 00 00 0f 00 00 00 00  |................|
00000020  00 00 00 00 00 00 00 00  25 00 00 00 00 00 00 00  |........%.......|
00000030  00 00 00 00 00 00 00 00  00 00 00 2b 00 00 00 00  |...........+....|
00000040  00 00 00 60 00 00 00 00  00 00 00 8f 00 00 00 00  |...`............|
00000050  00 00 00 df 00 00 00 00  00 00 01 14 00 00 00 00  |................|

Compatibility

Compatibility Matrix

X-axis: fortune program
Y-axis: cookies data file

Program / Cookies Ubuntu-24-04-x64 .dat Debian-12-x64 .dat Arch-linux .dat Fedora-41-x64 .dat Alpine-3-20-x64 .dat OpenSUSE-15-x64 .dat FreeBSD-14-x64 .dat OpenBSD-7-6 .dat Homebrew .dat
Ubuntu-24-04-x64 fortune
Debian-12-x64 fortune
Arch-linux fortune
Fedora-41-x64 fortune
Alpine-3-20-x64 fortune
OpenSUSE-15-x64 fortune
FreeBSD-14-x64 fortune
OpenBSD-7-6 fortune
Homebrew fortune

Most Linux and OpenBSD systems are compatible with each other. However, FreeBSD is not compatible with other systems, because the offset field is 64-bit, while other systems use 32-bit offset field. Homebrew's version of fortune is not compatible with any other system.

Raw Data

Ubuntu-24-04-x64

########################################
#        System: ubuntu-24-04-x64
########################################

##########[ fortune cookies/ubuntu-24 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
You will be winged by an anti-aircraft battery.
------------ <2> ------------
Someone is speaking well of you.
------------ <3> ------------
Afternoon very favorable for romance.  Try a single person for a change.
------------ <4> ------------
Afternoon very favorable for romance.  Try a single person for a change.
------------ <5> ------------
The whole world is a tuxedo and you are a pair of brown shoes.
		-- George Gobel
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/debian ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Beware of low-flying butterflies.
------------ <2> ------------
Keep emotionally active.  Cater to your favorite neurosis.
------------ <3> ------------
You prefer the company of the opposite sex, but are well liked by your own.
------------ <4> ------------
The whole world is a tuxedo and you are a pair of brown shoes.
		-- George Gobel
------------ <5> ------------
Another good night not to sleep in a eucalyptus tree.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/fedora ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Afternoon very favorable for romance.  Try a single person for a change.
------------ <2> ------------
You are scrupulously honest, frank, and straightforward.  Therefore you
have few friends.
------------ <3> ------------
Let me put it this way: today is going to be a learning experience.
------------ <4> ------------
A visit to a strange place will bring fresh work.
------------ <5> ------------
Bridge ahead.  Pay troll.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/opensuse ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Don't look now, but the man in the moon is laughing at you.
------------ <2> ------------
You will be run over by a beer truck.
------------ <3> ------------
What happened last night can happen again.
------------ <4> ------------
You're growing out of some of your problems, but there are others that
you're growing into.
------------ <5> ------------
Ships are safe in harbor, but they were never meant to stay there.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/arch-linux ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
You will become rich and famous unless you don't.
------------ <2> ------------
Generosity and perfection are your everlasting goals.
------------ <3> ------------
You're currently going through a difficult transition period called "Life."
------------ <4> ------------
Your reasoning is excellent -- it's only your basic assumptions that are wrong.
------------ <5> ------------
You are taking yourself far too seriously.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/alpine ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
43rd Law of Computing:
	Anything that can go wr
fortune: Segmentation violation -- Core dumped
------------ <2> ------------
Grandpa Charnock's Law:
	You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
------------ <3> ------------
All the big corporations depreciate their possessions, and you can,
too, provided you use them for business purposes.  For example, if you
subscribe to the Wall Street Journal, a business-related newspaper, you
can deduct the cost of your house, because, in the words of U.S.
Supreme Court Chief Justice Warren Burger in a landmark 1979 tax
decision: "Where else are you going to read the paper?  Outside?  What
if it rains?"
		-- Dave Barry, "Sweating Out Taxes"
------------ <4> ------------
... and furthermore ... I don't like your trousers.
------------ <5> ------------
Easiest Color to Solve on a Rubik's Cube:
	Black.  Simply remove all the little colored stickers on the
cube, and each of side of the cube will now be the original color of
the plastic underneath -- black.  According to the instructions, this
means the puzzle is solved.
		-- Steve Rubenstein
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/freebsd-14 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
If you have a CD-ROM drive in your machine, you can make the CD-ROM that is
presently inserted available by typing 'mount /cdrom' as root.  The CD-ROM
will be available under /cdrom/.  Remember to do 'umount /cdrom' before
removing the CD-ROM (it will usually not be possible to remove the CD-ROM
without doing this.)

Note: This tip may not work in all configurations.
------------ <2> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
------------ <3> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
------------ <4> ------------
Need to see which daemons are listening for connection requests? Use
"sockstat -4l" for IPv4, and "sockstat -l" for IPv4 and IPv6.
		-- Dru <genesis@istar.ca>
------------ <5> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/openbsd-7-6 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Begathon, n.:
	A multi-day event on public television, used to raise money so
you won't have to watch commercials.
------------ <2> ------------
Several years ago, some smart businessmen had an idea: Why not build a
big store where a do-it-yourselfer could get everything he needed at
reasonable prices?  Then they decided, nah, the hell with that, let's
build a home center.  And before long home centers were springing up
like crabgrass all over the United States.
		-- Dave Barry, "The Taming of the Screw"
------------ <3> ------------
There is no distinctly native American criminal class except Congress.
		-- Mark Twain
------------ <4> ------------
Office Automation, n.:
	The use of computers to improve efficiency by removing anyone
	you would want to talk with over coffee.
------------ <5> ------------
Know what I hate most?  Rhetorical questions.
		-- Henry N. Camp
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/homebrew ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
------------ <2> ------------
No fortunes found
------------ <3> ------------
No fortunes found
No fortunes found
------------ <4> ------------
------------ <5> ------------
No fortunes found
------------------------------
No fortunes found

Debian-12-x64

########################################
#        System: debian-12-x64
########################################

##########[ fortune cookies/ubuntu-24 ]##########
bash: warning: setlocale: LC_ALL: cannot change locale (en_US.UTF-8)
------------ <1> ------------
Avoid gunfire in the bathroom tonight.
------------ <2> ------------
You teach best what you most need to learn.
------------ <3> ------------
You will be attacked by a beast who has the body of a wolf, the tail of
a lion, and the face of Donald Duck.
------------ <4> ------------
Good night to spend with family, but avoid arguments with your mate's
new lover.
------------ <5> ------------
You worry too much about your job.  Stop it.  You are not paid enough to worry.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/debian ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Better hope the life-inspector doesn't come around while you have your
life in such a mess.
------------ <2> ------------
You can rent this space for only $5 a week.
------------ <3> ------------
Communicate!  It can't make things any worse.
------------ <4> ------------
Keep it short for pithy sake.
------------ <5> ------------
Your motives for doing whatever good deed you may have in mind will be
misinterpreted by somebody.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/fedora ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
You have a strong desire for a home and your family interests come first.
------------ <2> ------------
You feel a whole lot more like you do now than you did when you used to.
------------ <3> ------------
Communicate!  It can't make things any worse.
------------ <4> ------------
Your own qualities will help prevent your advancement in the world.
------------ <5> ------------
Don't let your mind wander -- it's too little to be let out alone.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/opensuse ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Make a wish, it might come true.
------------ <2> ------------
Fortune: You will be attacked next Wednesday at 3:15 p.m. by six samurai
sword wielding purple fish glued to Harley-Davidson motorcycles.

Oh, and have a nice day!
		-- Bryce Nesbitt '84
------------ <3> ------------
Exercise caution in your daily affairs.
------------ <4> ------------
Never give an inch!
------------ <5> ------------
While you recently had your problems on the run, they've regrouped and
are making another attack.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/arch-linux ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Good day for a change of scene.  Repaper the bedroom wall.
------------ <2> ------------
Try the Moo Shu Pork.  It is especially good today.
------------ <3> ------------
Your reasoning powers are good, and you are a fairly good planner.
------------ <4> ------------
You have a deep appreciation of the arts and music.
------------ <5> ------------
Your ignorance cramps my conversation.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/alpine ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Mollison's Bureaucracy Hypothesis:
	If an idea can survive a bureaucratic review and be implemented
	it wasn't worth doing.
------------ <2> ------------
In those days he was wiser than he is now -- he used to frequently take
my advice.
		-- Winston Churchill
------------ <3> ------------
McGowan's Madison Avenue Axiom:
	If an item is advertised as "under $50", you can bet it's not
	$19.95.
------------ <4> ------------
... so long as the people do not care to exercise their freedom, those
who wish to tyrannize will do so; for tyrants are active and ardent,
and will devote themselves in the name of any number of gods, religious
and otherwise, to put shackles upon sleeping men.
		-- Voltarine de Cleyre
------------ <5> ------------
A is for AMY who fell down the stairs, B is for BASIL assaulted by bears.
C is for CLARA who wasted away, D is for DESMOND thrown out of a sleigh.
E is for ERNEST who choked on a peach, F is for FANNY sucked dry by a leech.
G is for GEORGE smothered under a rug, H is for HECTOR done in by a thug.
I is for IDA who drowned in a lake, J is for JAMES who took lye by mistake.
K is for KATE who was struck with an axe, L is for LEO who swallowed some tacks.
M is for MAUD who was swept out to sea, N is for NEVILLE who died of ennui.
O is for OLIVE run through with an awl, P is for PRUE trampled flat in a brawl.
Q is for QUENTIN who sank in a mire, R is for RHODA consumed by a fire.
S is for SUSAN who perished of fits, T is for TITUS who flew into bits.
U is for UNA who slipped down a drain, V is for VICTOR squashed under a train.
W is for WINNIE embedded in ice, X is for XERXES devoured by mice.
Y is for YORICK whose head was knocked in,
Z is for ZILLAH who drank too much gin.
		-- Edward Gorey, "The Gashlycrumb Tinies"
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/freebsd-14 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
------------ <2> ------------
To save disk space in your home directory, compress files you rarely
use with "gzip filename".
		-- Dru <genesis@istar.ca>
------------ <3> ------------
Forget what directory you are in? Type "pwd".
		-- Dru <genesis@istar.ca>
------------ <4> ------------
Forget how to spell a word or a variation of a word? Use

	look portion_of_word_you_know
		-- Dru <genesis@istar.ca>
------------ <5> ------------
To see the IP addresses currently set on your active interfaces, type
"ifconfig -u".
		-- Dru <genesis@istar.ca>
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/openbsd-7-6 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
	Before he became a hermit, Zarathud was a young Priest, and
took great delight in making fools of his opponents in front of his
followers.
	One day Zarathud took his students to a pleasant pasture and
there he confronted The Sacred Chao while She was contentedly grazing.
	"Tell me, you dumb beast," demanded the Priest in his
commanding voice, "why don't you do something worthwhile?  What is your
Purpose in Life, anyway?"
	Munching the tasty grass, The Sacred Chao replied "MU".  (The
Chinese ideogram for NO-THING.)
	Upon hearing this, absolutely nobody was enlightened.
	Primarily because nobody understood Chinese.
		-- Camden Benares, "Zen Without Zen Masters"
------------ <2> ------------
Don't look back, the lemmings are gaining on you.
------------ <3> ------------
Arbitrary systems, pl.n.:
	Systems about which nothing general can be said, save "nothing
general can be said."
------------ <4> ------------
Who needs friends when you can sit alone in your room and drink?
------------ <5> ------------
A vacuum is a hell of a lot better than some of the stuff that nature
replaces it with.
		-- Tennessee Williams
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/homebrew ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
------------ <2> ------------
fortune: no fortune found
------------ <3> ------------
fortune: no fortune found
------------ <4> ------------
fortune: no fortune found
------------ <5> ------------
fortune: no fortune found
------------------------------
fortune: no fortune found

Arch-linux

##########[ fortune cookies/ubuntu-24 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Don't tell any big lies today.  Small ones can be just as effective.
------------ <2> ------------
If you think last Tuesday was a drag, wait till you see what happens tomorrow!
------------ <3> ------------
Cold hands, no gloves.
------------ <4> ------------
An exotic journey in downtown Newark is in your future.
------------ <5> ------------
Next Friday will not be your lucky day.  As a matter of fact, you don't
have a lucky day this year.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/debian ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Your ignorance cramps my conversation.
------------ <2> ------------
You will step on the night soil of many countries.
------------ <3> ------------
You have an unusual understanding of the problems of human relationships.
------------ <4> ------------
Don't get stuck in a closet -- wear yourself out.
------------ <5> ------------
You will have good luck and overcome many hardships.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/fedora ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
What happened last night can happen again.
------------ <2> ------------
A few hours grace before the madness begins again.
------------ <3> ------------
You will soon forget this.
------------ <4> ------------
You are not dead yet.  But watch for further reports.
------------ <5> ------------
Time to be aggressive.  Go after a tattooed Virgo.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/opensuse ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Try to get all of your posthumous medals in advance.
------------ <2> ------------
Artistic ventures highlighted.  Rob a museum.
------------ <3> ------------
It was all so different before everything changed.
------------ <4> ------------
If you sow your wild oats, hope for a crop failure.
------------ <5> ------------
You will become rich and famous unless you don't.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/arch-linux ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Everything will be just tickety-boo today.
------------ <2> ------------
You have no real enemies.
------------ <3> ------------
Give thought to your reputation.  Consider changing name and moving to
a new town.
------------ <4> ------------
Today is the first day of the rest of the mess.
------------ <5> ------------
Are you sure the back door is locked?
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/alpine ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
If God had not given us sticky tape,
it would have been necessary to invent it.
------------ <2> ------------
I must have slipped a disk -- my pack hurts!
------------ <3> ------------
The mosquito is the state bird of New Jersey.
		-- Andy Warhol
------------ <4> ------------
Take heart amid the deepening gloom that your dog is finally getting
enough cheese.
		-- National Lampoon, "Deteriorata"
------------ <5> ------------
Unnamed Law:
	If it happens, it must be possible.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/freebsd-14 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
------------ <2> ------------
Over quota?  "du -sh * | sort -h " will give you a sorted list of your
directory sizes.
		-- David Scheidt <dscheidt@tumbolia.com>
------------ <3> ------------
If you want to play CDs with FreeBSD, a utility for this is already included.
Type 'cdcontrol' then 'help' to learn more.  (You may need to set the CDROM
environment variable in order to make cdcontrol want to start.)
------------ <4> ------------
Need to quickly return to your home directory? Type "cd".
		-- Dru <genesis@istar.ca>
------------ <5> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/openbsd-7-6 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Dear Mister Language Person: I am curious about the expression, "Part
of this complete breakfast".  The way it comes up is, my 5-year-old
will be watching TV cartoon shows in the morning, and they'll show a
commercial for a children's compressed breakfast compound such as
"Froot Loops" or "Lucky Charms", and they always show it sitting on a
table next to some actual food such as eggs, and the announcer always
says: "Part of this complete breakfast".  Don't that really mean,
"Adjacent to this complete breakfast", or "On the same table as this
complete breakfast"?  And couldn't they make essentially the same claim
if, instead of Froot Loops, they put a can of shaving cream there, or a
dead bat?

Answer: Yes.
		-- Dave Barry, "Tips for Writer's"
------------ <2> ------------
This fortune cookie program is out of order.  For those in desperate need,
please use the program "randchar".  This program generates random
characters, and, given enough time, will undoubtedly come up with
something profound.  It will, however, take it no time at all to be
more profound than THIS program has ever been.
------------ <3> ------------
He was a fiddler, and consequently a rogue.
		-- Jonathan Swift
------------ <4> ------------
Accidents cause History.

If Sigismund Unbuckle had taken a walk in 1426 and met Wat Tyler, the
Peasant's Revolt would never have happened and the motor car would not
have been invented until 2026, which would have meant that all the oil
could have been used for lamps, thus saving the electric light bulb and
the whale, and nobody would have caught Moby Dick or Billy Budd.
		-- Mike Harding, "The Armchair Anarchist's Almanac"
------------ <5> ------------
What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists?  In that case, I
definitely overpaid for my carpet.
		-- Woody Allen, "Without Feathers"
------------------------------

Fedora-41-x64

########################################
#        System: fedora-41-x64
########################################

##########[ fortune cookies/ubuntu-24 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
You will obey or molten silver will be poured into your ears.
------------ <2> ------------
If you can read this, you're too close.
------------ <3> ------------
You will gain money by a fattening action.
------------ <4> ------------
You recoil from the crude; you tend naturally toward the exquisite.
------------ <5> ------------
Artistic ventures highlighted.  Rob a museum.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/debian ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Your lucky color has faded.
------------ <2> ------------
You will stop at nothing to reach your objective, but only because your
brakes are defective.
------------ <3> ------------
You get along very well with everyone except animals and people.
------------ <4> ------------
People are beginning to notice you.  Try dressing before you leave the house.
------------ <5> ------------
Do nothing unless you must, and when you must act -- hesitate.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/fedora ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Beauty and harmony are as necessary to you as the very breath of life.
------------ <2> ------------
You will experience a strong urge to do good; but it will pass.
------------ <3> ------------
Do not sleep in a eucalyptus tree tonight.
------------ <4> ------------
Slow day.  Practice crawling.
------------ <5> ------------
You now have Asian Flu.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/opensuse ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
You now have Asian Flu.
------------ <2> ------------
Tonight's the night: Sleep in a eucalyptus tree.
------------ <3> ------------
You will pay for your sins.  If you have already paid, please disregard
this message.
------------ <4> ------------
Do something unusual today.  Pay a bill.
------------ <5> ------------
You worry too much about your job.  Stop it.  You are not paid enough to worry.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/arch-linux ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
You now have Asian Flu.
------------ <2> ------------
You attempt things that you do not even plan because of your extreme stupidity.
------------ <3> ------------
You may be recognized soon.  Hide.
------------ <4> ------------
You have a strong appeal for members of your own sex.
------------ <5> ------------
You learn to write as if to someone else because NEXT YEAR YOU WILL BE
"SOMEONE ELSE."
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/alpine ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
You should never wear your best trousers when you go out to fight for
freedom and liberty.
		-- Henrik Ibsen
------------ <2> ------------
Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired
signifies in the final sense, a theft from those who hunger and are not
fed, those who are cold and are not clothed.  This world in arms is not
spending money alone.  It is spending the sweat of its laborers, the
genius of its scientists, the hopes of its children.  This is not a way
of life at all in any true sense.  Under the clouds of war, it is
humanity hanging on a cross of iron.
		-- Dwight Eisenhower, April 16, 1953
------------ <3> ------------
There is no realizable power that man cannot, in time, fashion the
tools to attain, nor any power so secure that the naked ape will not
abuse it.  So it is written in the genetic cards -- only physics and
war hold him in check.  And also the wife who wants him home by five,
of course.
		-- Encyclopedia Apocryphia, 1990 ed.
------------ <4> ------------
God made the world in six days, and was arrested on the seventh.
------------ <5> ------------
Pascal is Pascal is Pascal is dog meat.
		-- M. Devine and P. Larson, Computer Science 340
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/freebsd-14 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Need to leave your terminal for a few minutes and don't want to logout?
Use "lock -p". When you return, use your password as the key to unlock the
terminal.
		-- Dru <genesis@istar.ca>
------------ <2> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
------------ <3> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
------------ <4> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
------------ <5> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/openbsd-7-6 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
The human brain is like an enormous fish -- it is flat and slimy and
has gills through which it can see.
		-- Monty Python
------------ <2> ------------
LETTERS TO THE EDITOR (The Times of London)

Dear Sir,

I am firmly opposed to the spread of microchips either to the home or
to the office.  We have more than enough of them foisted upon us in
public places.  They are a disgusting Americanism, and can only result
in the farmers being forced to grow smaller potatoes, which in turn
will cause massive unemployment in the already severely depressed
agricultural industry.

Yours faithfully,
	Capt. Quinton D'Arcy, J. P.
	Sevenoaks
------------ <3> ------------
Blood flows down one leg and up the other.
------------ <4> ------------
Don't change the reason, just change the excuses!
		-- Joe Cointment
------------ <5> ------------
Burns' Hog Weighing Method:
	(1) Get a perfectly symmetrical plank and balance it across a
	    sawhorse.
	(2) Put the hog on one end of the plank.
	(3) Pile rocks on the other end until the plank is again
	    perfectly balanced.
	(4) Carefully guess the weight of the rocks.
		-- Robert Burns
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/homebrew ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
------------ <2> ------------
fortune: no fortune found
------------ <3> ------------
fortune: no fortune found
------------ <4> ------------
fortune: no fortune found
------------ <5> ------------
fortune: no fortune found
------------------------------
fortune: no fortune found

Alpine-3-20-x64

########################################
#        System: alpine
########################################

##########[ fortune cookies/ubuntu-24 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Afternoon very favorable for romance.  Try a single person for a change.
------------ <2> ------------
Don't get to bragging.
------------ <3> ------------
You work very hard.  Don't try to think as well.
------------ <4> ------------
Do what comes naturally.  Seethe and fume and throw a tantrum.
------------ <5> ------------
You may be infinitely smaller than some things, but you're infinitely
larger than others.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/debian ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Do something unusual today.  Pay a bill.
------------ <2> ------------
Are you making all this up as you go along?
------------ <3> ------------
You are always busy.
------------ <4> ------------
Everything will be just tickety-boo today.
------------ <5> ------------
Love is in the offing.  Be affectionate to one who adores you.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/fedora ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
You will engage in a profitable business activity.
------------ <2> ------------
Someone whom you reject today, will reject you tomorrow.
------------ <3> ------------
So you're back... about time...
------------ <4> ------------
Think twice before speaking, but don't say "think think click click".
------------ <5> ------------
You are dishonest, but never to the point of hurting a friend.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/opensuse ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
You will have long and healthy life.
------------ <2> ------------
Better hope the life-inspector doesn't come around while you have your
life in such a mess.
------------ <3> ------------
You will probably marry after a very brief courtship.
------------ <4> ------------
You have had a long-term stimulation relative to business.
------------ <5> ------------
Questionable day.

Ask somebody something.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/arch-linux ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
This will be a memorable month -- no matter how hard you try to forget it.
------------ <2> ------------
You are fairminded, just and loving.
------------ <3> ------------
You shall be rewarded for a dastardly deed.
------------ <4> ------------
You have a truly strong individuality.
------------ <5> ------------
Excellent time to become a missing person.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/alpine ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Where there's a will, there's an Inheritance Tax.
------------ <2> ------------
Furious activity is no substitute for understanding.
		-- H. H. Williams
------------ <3> ------------
Lackland's Laws:
	(1) Never be first.
	(2) Never be last.
	(3) Never volunteer for anything.
------------ <4> ------------
Tact is the ability to tell a man he has an open mind when he has a
hole in his head.
------------ <5> ------------
History repeats itself.  That's one thing wrong with history.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/freebsd-14 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
------------ <2> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
------------ <3> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
------------ <4> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
------------ <5> ------------
To do a fast search for a file, try

	 locate filename

locate uses a database that is updated every Saturday (assuming your computer
is running FreeBSD at the time) to quickly find files based on name only.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/openbsd-7-6 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
"First things first -- but not necessarily in that order"
		-- The Doctor, "Doctor Who"
------------ <2> ------------
Q:  How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?
A:  Two.  One to hold the giraffe and the other to fill the bathtub
    with brightly colored machine tools.
------------ <3> ------------
Schwiggle, n.:
	The amusing rotation of one's bottom while sharpening a
pencil.
		-- Rich Hall, "Sniglets"
------------ <4> ------------
Worst Month of 1981 for Downhill Skiing:
	August.  The lines are the shortest, though.
		-- Steve Rubenstein
------------ <5> ------------
		Safety Tips for the Post-Nuclear Existence
(1)  Never use an elevator in a building that has been hit by a nuclear
     bomb; use the stairs.
(2)  When you're flying through the air, remember to roll when you hit
     the ground.
(3)  If you're on fire, avoid gasoline and other flammable materials.
(4)  Don't attempt communication with dead people; it will only lead to
     psychological problems.
(5)  Food will be scarce; you will have to scavenge.  Learn to
     recognize foods that will be available after the bomb: mashed
     potatoes, shredded wheat, tossed salad, ground beef, etc.
(6)  Put your hand over your mouth when you sneeze; internal organs
     will be scarce in the post-nuclear age.
(7)  Try to be neat; fall only in designated piles.
(8)  Drive carefully in "Heavy Fallout" areas; people could be
     staggering illegally.
(9)  Nutritionally, hundred dollar bills are equal to ones, but more
     sanitary due to limited circulation.
(10) Accumulate mannequins now; spare parts will be in short supply on
     D-Day.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/homebrew ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
------------ <2> ------------
------------ <3> ------------
------------ <4> ------------
------------ <5> ------------
------------------------------
fortune: cookies/homebrew/fortunes is empty
fortune: cookies/homebrew/fortunes is empty
fortune: cookies/homebrew/fortunes is empty
fortune: cookies/homebrew/fortunes is empty
fortune: cookies/homebrew/fortunes is empty

OpenSUSE-15-x64

########################################
#        System: opensuse
########################################

##########[ fortune cookies/ubuntu-24 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Is this really happening?
------------ <2> ------------
Good news.  Ten weeks from Friday will be a pretty good day.
------------ <3> ------------
You'll feel devilish tonight.  Toss dynamite caps under a flamenco dancer's
heel.
------------ <4> ------------
There will be big changes for you but you will be happy.
------------ <5> ------------
Your reasoning powers are good, and you are a fairly good planner.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/debian ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
You are sick, twisted and perverted.  I like that in a person.
------------ <2> ------------
You have an ambitious nature and may make a name for yourself.
------------ <3> ------------
You will have domestic happiness and faithful friends.
------------ <4> ------------
You love peace.
------------ <5> ------------
You will be Told about it Tomorrow.  Go Home and Prepare Thyself.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/fedora ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Tomorrow, you can be anywhere.
------------ <2> ------------
Today is National Existential Ennui Awareness Day.
------------ <3> ------------
Be careful!  Is it classified?
------------ <4> ------------
Questionable day.

Ask somebody something.
------------ <5> ------------
You are magnetic in your bearing.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/opensuse ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
You will be the last person to buy a Chrysler.
------------ <2> ------------
Questionable day.

Ask somebody something.
------------ <3> ------------
Do what comes naturally.  Seethe and fume and throw a tantrum.
------------ <4> ------------
You're working under a slight handicap.  You happen to be human.
------------ <5> ------------
Save energy: be apathetic.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/arch-linux ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
You are destined to become the commandant of the fighting men of the
department of transportation.
------------ <2> ------------
Your reasoning powers are good, and you are a fairly good planner.
------------ <3> ------------
Someone is speaking well of you.
------------ <4> ------------
Don't look now, but the man in the moon is laughing at you.
------------ <5> ------------
You love your home and want it to be beautiful.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/alpine ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Gyroscope, n.:
	A wheel or disk mounted to spin rapidly about an axis and also
free to rotate about one or both of two axes perpendicular to each
other and the axis of spin so that a rotation of one of the two
mutually perpendicular axes results from application of torque to the
other when the wheel is spinning and so that the entire apparatus
offers considerable opposition depending on the angular momentum to any
torque that would change the direction of the axis of spin.
		-- Webster's Seventh New Collegiate Dictionary
------------ <2> ------------
You can create your own opportunities this week.
Blackmail a senior executive.
------------ <3> ------------
Heavy, adj.:
	Seduced by the chocolate side of the force.
------------ <4> ------------
System/3!  System/3!
See how it runs!  See how it runs!
	Its monitor loses so totally!
	It runs all its programs in RPG!
	It's made by our favorite monopoly!
System/3!
------------ <5> ------------
The superfluous is very necessary.
		-- Voltaire
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/freebsd-14 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
To clear the screen, use "clear". To re-display your screen buffer, press
the scroll lock key and use your page up button. When you're finished,
press the scroll lock key again to get your prompt back.
		-- Dru <genesis@istar.ca>
------------ <2> ------------
To see all of the directories on your FreeBSD system, type

	find / -type d | less

All the files?

	find / -type f | less
------------ <3> ------------
Time to change your password? Type "passwd" and follow the prompts.
		-- Dru <genesis@istar.ca>
------------ <4> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
------------ <5> ------------
Having trouble using fetch through a firewall? Try setting the environment
variable FTP_PASSIVE_MODE to yes, and see fetch(3) for more details.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/openbsd-7-6 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Anarchy may not be the best form of government, but it's better than no
government at all.
------------ <2> ------------
Wood is highly ecological, since trees are a renewable resource.  If
you cut down a tree, another will grow in its place.  And if you cut
down the new tree, still another will grow.  And if you cut down that
tree, yet another will grow, only this one will be a mutation with
long, poisonous tentacles and revenge in its heart, and it will sit
there in the forest, cackling and making elaborate plans for when you
come back.

Wood heat is not new.  It dates back to a day millions of years ago,
when a group of cavemen were sitting around, watching dinosaurs rot.
Suddenly, lightning struck a nearby log and set it on fire.  One of the
cavemen stared at the fire for a few minutes, then said: "Hey!  Wood
heat!"  The other cavemen, who did not understand English, immediately
beat him to death with stones.  But the key discovery had been made,
and from that day forward, the cavemen had all the heat they needed,
although their insurance rates went way up.
		-- Dave Barry, "Postpetroleum Guzzler"
------------ <3> ------------
Real computer scientists only write specs for languages that might run
on future hardware.  Nobody trusts them to write specs for anything homo
sapiens will ever be able to fit on a single planet.
------------ <4> ------------
I couldn't remember when I had been so disappointed.  Except perhaps
the time I found out that M&Ms really *do* melt in your hand ...
		-- Peter Oakley
------------ <5> ------------
Families, when a child is born
Want it to be intelligent.
I, through intelligence,
Having wrecked my whole life,
Only hope the baby will prove
Ignorant and stupid.
Then he will crown a tranquil life
By becoming a Cabinet Minister
		-- Su Tung-p'o
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/homebrew ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
------------ <2> ------------
fortune: no fortune found
------------ <3> ------------
fortune: no fortune found
------------ <4> ------------
fortune: no fortune found
------------ <5> ------------
fortune: no fortune found
fortune: no fortune found
------------------------------

FreeBSD-14-x64

########################################
#        System: freebsd-14
########################################

##########[ fortune cookies/ubuntu-24 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
------------ <2> ------------
A day for firm decisions!!!!!  Or is it?
------------ <3> ------------
A day for firm decisions!!!!!  Or is it?
------------ <4> ------------
------------ <5> ------------
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/debian ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
------------ <2> ------------
------------ <3> ------------
------------ <4> ------------
------------ <5> ------------
A day for firm decisions!!!!!  Or is it?
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/fedora ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
A day for firm decisions!!!!!  Or is it?
------------ <2> ------------
------------ <3> ------------
A day for firm decisions!!!!!  Or is it?
------------ <4> ------------
------------ <5> ------------
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/opensuse ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
A day for firm decisions!!!!!  Or is it?
------------ <2> ------------
------------ <3> ------------
------------ <4> ------------
A day for firm decisions!!!!!  Or is it?
------------ <5> ------------
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/arch-linux ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
A day for firm decisions!!!!!  Or is it?
------------ <2> ------------
------------ <3> ------------
A day for firm decisions!!!!!  Or is it?
------------ <4> ------------
A day for firm decisions!!!!!  Or is it?
------------ <5> ------------
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/alpine ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
!07/11 PDP a ni deppart m'I  !pleH
------------ <2> ------------
!07/11 PDP a ni deppart m'I  !pleH
------------ <3> ------------
!07/11 PDP a ni deppart m'I  !pleH
------------ <4> ------------
------------ <5> ------------
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/freebsd-14 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
To run rc scripts in /etc/rc.d and /usr/local/etc/rc.d use service(8).
Run "service ${name_of_rc_script} start" to start a daemon and
"service ${name_of_rc_script} stop" to stop it.

		-- Lars Engels <lme@FreeBSD.org>
------------ <2> ------------
You can adjust the volume of various parts of the sound system in your
computer by typing 'mixer <type>.volume=<volume>%'.  To get a list of what
you can adjust, just type 'mixer'.
------------ <3> ------------
Forget when Easter is? Try "ncal -e". If you need the date for Orthodox
Easter, use "ncal -o" instead.
		-- Dru <genesis@istar.ca>
------------ <4> ------------
If you need a reminder to leave your terminal, type "leave +hhmm" where
"hhmm" represents in how many hours and minutes you need to leave.
		-- Dru <genesis@istar.ca>
------------ <5> ------------
To find out the hostname associated with an IP address, use

	drill -x IP_address
		-- Dru <genesis@istar.ca>
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/openbsd-7-6 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
------------ <2> ------------
------------ <3> ------------
------------ <4> ------------
!07/11 PDP a ni deppart m'I  !pleH
------------ <5> ------------
!07/11 PDP a ni deppart m'I  !pleH
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/homebrew ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
------------ <2> ------------
Segmentation fault (core dumped)
------------ <3> ------------
Segmentation fault (core dumped)
------------ <4> ------------
Segmentation fault (core dumped)
------------ <5> ------------
Segmentation fault (core dumped)
------------------------------
Segmentation fault (core dumped)

OpenBSD-7-6

########################################
#        System: openbsd-7-6
########################################

##########[ fortune cookies/ubuntu-24 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
An avocado-tone refrigerator would look good on your resume.
------------ <2> ------------
Love is in the offing.  Be affectionate to one who adores you.
------------ <3> ------------
You've been leading a dog's life.  Stay off the furniture.
------------ <4> ------------
You shall be rewarded for a dastardly deed.
------------ <5> ------------
You will have a long and boring life.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/debian ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
You definitely intend to start living sometime soon.
------------ <2> ------------
Your object is to save the world, while still leading a pleasant life.
------------ <3> ------------
Don't get to bragging.
------------ <4> ------------
Your best consolation is the hope that the things you failed to get weren't
really worth having.
------------ <5> ------------
You're currently going through a difficult transition period called "Life."
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/fedora ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Don't look now, but the man in the moon is laughing at you.
------------ <2> ------------
You have a strong desire for a home and your family interests come first.
------------ <3> ------------
You've been leading a dog's life.  Stay off the furniture.
------------ <4> ------------
There is a fly on your nose.
------------ <5> ------------
Your supervisor is thinking about you.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/opensuse ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
You will be held hostage by a radical group.
------------ <2> ------------
You'd like to do it instantaneously, but that's too slow.
------------ <3> ------------
Stay away from flying saucers today.
------------ <4> ------------
Life is to you a dashing and bold adventure.
------------ <5> ------------
Never reveal your best argument.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/arch-linux ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
You have the body of a 19 year old.  Please return it before it gets wrinkled.
------------ <2> ------------
Snow Day -- stay home.
------------ <3> ------------
Be different: conform.
------------ <4> ------------
You had some happiness once, but your parents moved away, and you had to
leave it behind.
------------ <5> ------------
You are going to have a new love affair.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/alpine ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
The law will never make men free; it is men who have got to make the
law free.
		-- Henry David Thoreau
------------ <2> ------------
He was so narrow minded he could see through a keyhole with both eyes.
------------ <3> ------------
Of all possible committee reactions to any given agenda item, the
reaction that will occur is the one which will liberate the greatest
amount of hot air.
		-- Thomas L. Martin
------------ <4> ------------
Baseball is a skilled game.  It's America's game -- it, and high
taxes.
		-- Will Rogers
------------ <5> ------------
Usage: fortune -P [] -a [xsz] [Q: [file]] [rKe9] -v6[+] dataspec ... inputdir
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/freebsd-14 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
sh (the default Bourne shell in FreeBSD) supports command-line editing.  Just
``set -o emacs'' or ``set -o vi'' to enable it. Use "<TAB>" key to complete
paths.
------------ <2> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
------------ <3> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
------------ <4> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
------------ <5> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/openbsd-7-6 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Finagle's Third Law:
	In any collection of data, the figure most obviously correct,
	beyond all need of checking, is the mistake.

Corollaries:
	(1) Nobody whom you ask for help will see it.
	(2) The first person who stops by, whose advice you really
	    don't want to hear, will see it immediately.
------------ <2> ------------
Many years ago in a period commonly known as Next Friday Afternoon,
there lived a King who was very Gloomy on Tuesday mornings because he
was so Sad thinking about how Unhappy he had been on Monday and how
completely Mournful he would be on Wednesday ...
		-- Walt Kelly
------------ <3> ------------
Major Premise: Sixty men can do a piece of work sixty times as quickly
	as one man.

Minor Premise: One man can dig a posthole in sixty seconds.

Conclusion: Sixty men can dig a posthole in one second.
		-- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
------------ <4> ------------
Test-tube babies shouldn't throw stones.
------------ <5> ------------
Modern man is the missing link between apes and human beings.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/homebrew ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
fortune: cookies/homebrew/fortunes is empty
------------ <2> ------------
------------ <3> ------------
fortune: cookies/homebrew/fortunes is empty
------------ <4> ------------
fortune: cookies/homebrew/fortunes is empty
------------ <5> ------------
fortune: cookies/homebrew/fortunes is empty
------------------------------
fortune: cookies/homebrew/fortunes is empty

Homebrew

##########[ fortune cookies/ubuntu-24 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Make a wish, it might come true.
%
Many changes of mind and mood; do not hesitate too long.
%
Never be led astray onto the path of virtue.
%
Never commit yourself!  Let someone else commit you.
%
Never give an inch!
%
Never look up when dragons fly overhead.
%
Never reveal your best argument.
%
Next Friday will not be your lucky day.  As a matter of fact, you don't
have a lucky day this year.
%
Of course you have a purpose -- to find a purpose.
%
People are beginning to notice you.  Try dressing before you leave the house.
------------ <2> ------------
Beware of a tall blond man with one black shoe.
%
Beware of Bigfoot!
%
Beware of low-flying butterflies.
%
Beware the one behind you.
%
Blow it out your ear.
%
Break into jail and claim police brutality.
%
Bridge ahead.  Pay troll.
%
Caution: breathing may be hazardous to your health.
%
Caution: Keep out of reach of children.
%
Celebrate Hannibal Day this year.  Take an elephant to lunch.
%
------------ <3> ------------
Excellent day to have a rotten day.
%
Excellent time to become a missing person.
%
Executive ability is prominent in your make-up.
%
Exercise caution in your daily affairs.
%
Expect a letter from a friend who will ask a favor of you.
%
Expect the worst, it's the least you can do.
%
Fine day for friends.
So-so day for you.
%
Fine day to work off excess energy.  Steal something heavy.
%
Fortune: You will be attacked next Wednesday at 3:15 p.m. by six samurai
sword wielding purple fish glued to Harley-Davidson motorcycles.

------------ <4> ------------
You will always get the greatest recognition for the job you least like.
%
You will always have good luck in your personal affairs.
%
You will attract cultured and artistic people to your home.
%
You will be a winner today.  Pick a fight with a four-year-old.
%
You will be advanced socially, without any special effort on your part.
%
You will be aided greatly by a person whom you thought to be unimportant.
%
You will be attacked by a beast who has the body of a wolf, the tail of
a lion, and the face of Donald Duck.
%
You will be audited by the Internal Revenue Service.
%
You will be awarded a medal for disregarding safety in saving someone.
%
You will be awarded some great honor.
------------ <5> ------------
You are deeply attached to your friends and acquaintances.
%
You are destined to become the commandant of the fighting men of the
department of transportation.
%
You are dishonest, but never to the point of hurting a friend.
%
You are fairminded, just and loving.
%
You are farsighted, a good planner, an ardent lover, and a faithful friend.
%
You are fighting for survival in your own sweet and gentle way.
%
You are going to have a new love affair.
%
You are magnetic in your bearing.
%
You are not dead yet.  But watch for further reports.
%
You are number 6!  Who is number one?
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/debian ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Abandon the search for Truth; settle for a good fantasy.
%
Accent on helpful side of your nature.  Drain the moat.
%
Advancement in position.
%
After your lover has gone you will still have PEANUT BUTTER!
%
Afternoon very favorable for romance.  Try a single person for a change.
%
Alimony and bribes will engage a large share of your wealth.
%
All the troubles you have will pass away very quickly.
%
Among the lucky, you are the chosen one.
%
An avocado-tone refrigerator would look good on your resume.
%
An exotic journey in downtown Newark is in your future.
%
------------ <2> ------------
Do something unusual today.  Pay a bill.
%
Do what comes naturally.  Seethe and fume and throw a tantrum.
%
Domestic happiness and faithful friends.
%
Don't feed the bats tonight.
%
Don't get stuck in a closet -- wear yourself out.
%
Don't get to bragging.
%
Don't go surfing in South Dakota for a while.
%
Don't hate yourself in the morning -- sleep till noon.
%
Don't kiss an elephant on the lips today.
%
Don't let your mind wander -- it's too little to be let out alone.
%
------------ <3> ------------
Time to be aggressive.  Go after a tattooed Virgo.
%
Today is National Existential Ennui Awareness Day.
%
Today is the first day of the rest of the mess.
%
Today is the first day of the rest of your life.
%
Today is the last day of your life so far.
%
Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.
%
Today is what happened to yesterday.
%
Today's weirdness is tomorrow's reason why.
		-- Hunter S. Thompson
%
Tomorrow will be cancelled due to lack of interest.
%
Tomorrow, this will be part of the unchangeable past but fortunately,
------------ <4> ------------
Reply hazy, ask again later.
%
Save energy: be apathetic.
%
Ships are safe in harbor, but they were never meant to stay there.
%
Slow day.  Practice crawling.
%
Snow Day -- stay home.
%
So this is it.  We're going to die.
%
So you're back... about time...
%
Someone is speaking well of you.
%
Someone is speaking well of you.

How unusual!
%
------------ <5> ------------
Good news.  Ten weeks from Friday will be a pretty good day.
%
Good night to spend with family, but avoid arguments with your mate's
new lover.
%
Green light in A.M. for new projects.  Red light in P.M. for traffic tickets.
%
Hope that the day after you die is a nice day.
%
If you can read this, you're too close.
%
If you learn one useless thing every day, in a single year you'll learn
365 useless things.
%
If you sow your wild oats, hope for a crop failure.
%
If you stand on your head, you will get footprints in your hair.
%
If you think last Tuesday was a drag, wait till you see what happens tomorrow!
%
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/fedora ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Give thought to your reputation.  Consider changing name and moving to
a new town.
%
Give your very best today.  Heaven knows it's little enough.
%
Go to a movie tonight.  Darkness becomes you.
%
Good day for a change of scene.  Repaper the bedroom wall.
%
Good day for overcoming obstacles.  Try a steeplechase.
%
Good day to deal with people in high places; particularly lonely stewardesses.
%
Good day to let down old friends who need help.
%
Good news from afar can bring you a welcome visitor.
%
Good news.  Ten weeks from Friday will be a pretty good day.
%
Good night to spend with family, but avoid arguments with your mate's
------------ <2> ------------
Advancement in position.
%
After your lover has gone you will still have PEANUT BUTTER!
%
Afternoon very favorable for romance.  Try a single person for a change.
%
Alimony and bribes will engage a large share of your wealth.
%
All the troubles you have will pass away very quickly.
%
Among the lucky, you are the chosen one.
%
An avocado-tone refrigerator would look good on your resume.
%
An exotic journey in downtown Newark is in your future.
%
Another good night not to sleep in a eucalyptus tree.
%
Are you a turtle?
%
------------ <3> ------------
You will be surprised by a loud noise.
%
You will be surrounded by luxury.
%
You will be the last person to buy a Chrysler.
%
You will be the victim of a bizarre joke.
%
You will be Told about it Tomorrow.  Go Home and Prepare Thyself.
%
You will be traveling and coming into a fortune.
%
You will be winged by an anti-aircraft battery.
%
You will become rich and famous unless you don't.
%
You will contract a rare disease.
%
You will engage in a profitable business activity.
%
------------ <4> ------------
You are always busy.
%
You are as I am with You.
%
You are capable of planning your future.
%
You are confused; but this is your normal state.
%
You are deeply attached to your friends and acquaintances.
%
You are destined to become the commandant of the fighting men of the
department of transportation.
%
You are dishonest, but never to the point of hurting a friend.
%
You are fairminded, just and loving.
%
You are farsighted, a good planner, an ardent lover, and a faithful friend.
%
You are fighting for survival in your own sweet and gentle way.
------------ <5> ------------
You will experience a strong urge to do good; but it will pass.
%
You will feel hungry again in another hour.
%
You will forget that you ever knew me.
%
You will gain money by a fattening action.
%
You will gain money by a speculation or lottery.
%
You will gain money by an illegal action.
%
You will gain money by an immoral action.
%
You will get what you deserve.
%
You will give someone a piece of your mind, which you can ill afford.
%
You will have a long and boring life.
%
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/opensuse ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Don't go surfing in South Dakota for a while.
%
Don't hate yourself in the morning -- sleep till noon.
%
Don't kiss an elephant on the lips today.
%
Don't let your mind wander -- it's too little to be let out alone.
%
Don't look back, the lemmings are gaining on you.
%
Don't look now, but the man in the moon is laughing at you.
%
Don't look now, but there is a multi-legged creature on your shoulder.
%
Don't plan any hasty moves.  You'll be evicted soon anyway.
%
Don't read any sky-writing for the next two weeks.
%
Don't read everything you believe.
%
------------ <2> ------------
You too can wear a nose mitten.
%
You two ought to be more careful--your love could drag on for years and years.
%
You will always get the greatest recognition for the job you least like.
%
You will always have good luck in your personal affairs.
%
You will attract cultured and artistic people to your home.
%
You will be a winner today.  Pick a fight with a four-year-old.
%
You will be advanced socially, without any special effort on your part.
%
You will be aided greatly by a person whom you thought to be unimportant.
%
You will be attacked by a beast who has the body of a wolf, the tail of
a lion, and the face of Donald Duck.
%
You will be audited by the Internal Revenue Service.
------------ <3> ------------
You too can wear a nose mitten.
%
You two ought to be more careful--your love could drag on for years and years.
%
You will always get the greatest recognition for the job you least like.
%
You will always have good luck in your personal affairs.
%
You will attract cultured and artistic people to your home.
%
You will be a winner today.  Pick a fight with a four-year-old.
%
You will be advanced socially, without any special effort on your part.
%
You will be aided greatly by a person whom you thought to be unimportant.
%
You will be attacked by a beast who has the body of a wolf, the tail of
a lion, and the face of Donald Duck.
%
You will be audited by the Internal Revenue Service.
------------ <4> ------------
Chess tonight.
%
Chicken Little only has to be right once.
%
Chicken Little was right.
%
Cold hands, no gloves.
%
Communicate!  It can't make things any worse.
%
Courage is your greatest present need.
%
Day of inquiry.  You will be subpoenaed.
%
Do not overtax your powers.
%
Do not sleep in a eucalyptus tree tonight.
%
Do nothing unless you must, and when you must act -- hesitate.
%
------------ <5> ------------
You may be infinitely smaller than some things, but you're infinitely
larger than others.
%
You may be recognized soon.  Hide.
%
You may get an opportunity for advancement today.  Watch it!
%
You may worry about your hair-do today, but tomorrow much peanut butter will
be sold.
%
You need more time; and you probably always will.
%
You need no longer worry about the future.  This time tomorrow you'll be dead.
%
You never hesitate to tackle the most difficult problems.
%
You never know how many friends you have until you rent a house on the beach.
%
You now have Asian Flu.
%
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/arch-linux ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
The time is right to make new friends.
%
The whole world is a tuxedo and you are a pair of brown shoes.
		-- George Gobel
%
There is a 20% chance of tomorrow.
%
There is a fly on your nose.
%
There was a phone call for you.
%
There will be big changes for you but you will be happy.
%
Things will be bright in P.M.  A cop will shine a light in your face.
%
Think twice before speaking, but don't say "think think click click".
%
This life is yours.  Some of it was given to you; the rest, you made yourself.
%
This will be a memorable month -- no matter how hard you try to forget it.
------------ <2> ------------
If you think last Tuesday was a drag, wait till you see what happens tomorrow!
%
If your life was a horse, you'd have to shoot it.
%
In the stairway of life, you'd best take the elevator.
%
Increased knowledge will help you now.  Have mate's phone bugged.
%
Is that really YOU that is reading this?
%
Is this really happening?
%
It is so very hard to be an
on-your-own-take-care-of-yourself-because-there-is-no-one-else-to-do-it-for-you
grown-up.
%
It may or may not be worthwhile, but it still has to be done.
%
It was all so different before everything changed.
%
------------ <3> ------------
You are the only person to ever get this message.
%
You are wise, witty, and wonderful, but you spend too much time reading
this sort of trash.
%
You attempt things that you do not even plan because of your extreme stupidity.
%
You can create your own opportunities this week.  Blackmail a senior executive.
%
You can do very well in speculation where land or anything to do with dirt
is concerned.
%
You can rent this space for only $5 a week.
%
You could live a better life, if you had a better mind and a better body.
%
You definitely intend to start living sometime soon.
%
You dialed 5483.
%
------------ <4> ------------
Avoid reality at all costs.
%
Bank error in your favor.  Collect $200.
%
Be careful!  Is it classified?
%
Be careful!  UGLY strikes 9 out of 10!
%
Be cautious in your daily affairs.
%
Be cheerful while you are alive.
		-- Phathotep, 24th Century B.C.
%
Be different: conform.
%
Be free and open and breezy!  Enjoy!  Things won't get any better so
get used to it.
%
Be security conscious -- National defense is at stake.
%
------------ <5> ------------
You have literary talent that you should take pains to develop.
%
You have many friends and very few living enemies.
%
You have no real enemies.
%
You have taken yourself too seriously.
%
You have the body of a 19 year old.  Please return it before it gets wrinkled.
%
You have the capacity to learn from mistakes.  You'll learn a lot today.
%
You have the power to influence all with whom you come in contact.
%
You learn to write as if to someone else because NEXT YEAR YOU WILL BE
"SOMEONE ELSE."
%
You like to form new friendships and make new acquaintances.
%
You look like a million dollars.  All green and wrinkled.
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/alpine ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
!07/11 PDP a ni deppart m'I  !pleH
%
(1) Alexander the Great was a great general.
(2) Great generals are forewarned.
(3) Forewarned is forearmed.
(4) Four is an even number.
(5) Four is certainly an odd number of arms for a man to have.
(6) The only number that is both even and odd is infinity.

Therefore, Alexander the Great had an infinite number of arms.
%
(1) Everything depends.
(2) Nothing is always.
(3) Everything is sometimes.
%
1.79 x 10^12 furlongs per fortnight -- it's not just a good idea, it's
the law!
%
10.0 times 0.1 is hardly ever 1.0.
%
------------ <2> ------------
(Sung to the tune of "The Impossible Dream" from MAN OF LA MANCHA)

	To code the impossible code,
	To bring up a virgin machine,
	To pop out of endless recursion,
	To grok what appears on the screen,

	To right the unrightable bug,
	To endlessly twiddle and thrash,
	To mount the unmountable magtape,
	To stop the unstoppable crash!
%
Support bacteria -- it's the only culture some people have!
%
Support wildlife -- vote for an orgy.
%
Support your local police force -- steal!!
%
Support your local Search and Rescue unit -- get lost.
%
------------ <3> ------------
Keep emotionally active.  Cater to your favorite neurosis.
%
Keep grandma off the streets -- legalize bingo.
%
Keep in mind always the two constant Laws of Frisbee:
	(1) The most powerful force in the world is that of a disc
	    straining to land under a car, just out of reach (this
	    force is technically termed "car suck").
	(2) Never precede any maneuver by a comment more predictive
	    than "Watch this!"
%
Keep your Eye on the Ball,
Your Shoulder to the Wheel,
Your Nose to the Grindstone,
Your Feet on the Ground,
Your Head on your Shoulders.
Now ... try to get something DONE!
%
Ken Thompson has an automobile which he helped design.  Unlike most
automobiles, it has neither speedometer, nor gas gage, nor any of the
------------ <4> ------------
And on the seventh day, He exited from append mode.
%
"... And remember: if you don't like the news, go out and make some of
your own."
        	-- "Scoop" Nisker, KFOG radio reporter
		   Preposterous Words
%
And so, men, we can see that human skin is an even more complex and
fascinating organ than we thought it was, and if we want to keep it
looking good, we have to care for it as though it were our own.  One
approach is to undergo a painful surgical procedure wherein your skin
is turned inside-out, so the young cells are on the outside, but then
of course you have the unpleasant side effect that your insides
gradually fill up with dead old cells and you explode.  So this
procedure is pretty much limited to top Hollywood stars for whom
youthful beauty is a career necessity, such as Elizabeth Taylor and
Orson Welles.
		-- Dave Barry, "Saving Face"
%
"...and the fully armed nuclear warheads, are, of course, merely a
------------ <5> ------------
A Law of Computer Programming:
	Make it possible for programmers to write in English and you
will find the programmers cannot write in English.
%
A limerick packs laughs anatomical
Into space that is quite economical.
	But the good ones I've seen
	So seldom are clean,
And the clean ones so seldom are comical.
%
A LISP programmer knows the value of everything, but the cost of
nothing.
		-- Alan Perlis
%
A little inaccuracy sometimes saves tons of explanation.
		-- H. H. Munroe, "Saki"
%
A long memory is the most subversive idea in America.
%
A long-forgotten loved one will appear soon.  Buy the negatives at any
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/freebsd-14 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
%
By pressing "Scroll Lock" you can use the arrow keys to scroll backward
through the console output.  Press "Scroll Lock" again to turn it off.
Don't have a "Scroll Lock" key? The "Pause / Break" key acts alike.
%
Can't remember if you've installed a certain port or not? Try "pkg info
-x port_name".
%
Ever wonder what those numbers after command names were, as in cat(1)?  It's
the section of the manual the man page is in.  "man man" will tell you more.
		-- David Scheidt <dscheidt@tumbolia.com>
%
Forget how to spell a word or a variation of a word? Use

	look portion_of_word_you_know
		-- Dru <genesis@istar.ca>
------------ <2> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
%
By pressing "Scroll Lock" you can use the arrow keys to scroll backward
through the console output.  Press "Scroll Lock" again to turn it off.
Don't have a "Scroll Lock" key? The "Pause / Break" key acts alike.
%
Can't remember if you've installed a certain port or not? Try "pkg info
-x port_name".
%
Ever wonder what those numbers after command names were, as in cat(1)?  It's
the section of the manual the man page is in.  "man man" will tell you more.
		-- David Scheidt <dscheidt@tumbolia.com>
%
Forget how to spell a word or a variation of a word? Use

	look portion_of_word_you_know
		-- Dru <genesis@istar.ca>
------------ <3> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
%
By pressing "Scroll Lock" you can use the arrow keys to scroll backward
through the console output.  Press "Scroll Lock" again to turn it off.
Don't have a "Scroll Lock" key? The "Pause / Break" key acts alike.
%
Can't remember if you've installed a certain port or not? Try "pkg info
-x port_name".
%
Ever wonder what those numbers after command names were, as in cat(1)?  It's
the section of the manual the man page is in.  "man man" will tell you more.
		-- David Scheidt <dscheidt@tumbolia.com>
%
Forget how to spell a word or a variation of a word? Use

	look portion_of_word_you_know
		-- Dru <genesis@istar.ca>
------------ <4> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
%
By pressing "Scroll Lock" you can use the arrow keys to scroll backward
through the console output.  Press "Scroll Lock" again to turn it off.
Don't have a "Scroll Lock" key? The "Pause / Break" key acts alike.
%
Can't remember if you've installed a certain port or not? Try "pkg info
-x port_name".
%
Ever wonder what those numbers after command names were, as in cat(1)?  It's
the section of the manual the man page is in.  "man man" will tell you more.
		-- David Scheidt <dscheidt@tumbolia.com>
%
Forget how to spell a word or a variation of a word? Use

	look portion_of_word_you_know
		-- Dru <genesis@istar.ca>
------------ <5> ------------
Any user that is a member of the wheel group can use "su -" to simulate
a root login. You can add a user to the wheel group with:
pw groupmod -n wheel -m user_name
		-- Konstantinos Konstantinidis <kkonstan@duth.gr>
%
By pressing "Scroll Lock" you can use the arrow keys to scroll backward
through the console output.  Press "Scroll Lock" again to turn it off.
Don't have a "Scroll Lock" key? The "Pause / Break" key acts alike.
%
Can't remember if you've installed a certain port or not? Try "pkg info
-x port_name".
%
Ever wonder what those numbers after command names were, as in cat(1)?  It's
the section of the manual the man page is in.  "man man" will tell you more.
		-- David Scheidt <dscheidt@tumbolia.com>
%
Forget how to spell a word or a variation of a word? Use

	look portion_of_word_you_know
		-- Dru <genesis@istar.ca>
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/openbsd-7-6 ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
Keep Cool, but Don't Freeze
		-- Hellman's Mayonnaise
%
Keep emotionally active.  Cater to your favorite neurosis.
%
Keep grandma off the streets -- legalize bingo.
%
Keep in mind always the two constant Laws of Frisbee:
	(1) The most powerful force in the world is that of a disc
	    straining to land under a car, just out of reach (this
	    force is technically termed "car suck").
	(2) Never precede any maneuver by a comment more predictive
	    than "Watch this!"
%
Keep your Eye on the Ball,
Your Shoulder to the Wheel,
Your Nose to the Grindstone,
Your Feet on the Ground,
Your Head on your Shoulders.
Now ... try to get something DONE!
------------ <2> ------------
Johnson's First Law:
	When any mechanical contrivance fails, it will do so at the
most inconvenient possible time.
%
Join in the new game that's sweeping the country.  It's called
"Bureaucracy".  Everybody stands in a circle.  The first person to do
anything loses.
%
Join the march to save individuality!
%
Jone's Law:
	The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone
to blame it on.
%
Jone's Motto:
	Friends come and go, but enemies accumulate.
%
Jones's First Law:
	Anyone who makes a significant contribution to any field of
	endeavor, and stays in that field long enough, becomes an
------------ <3> ------------
There's nothing in the middle of the road but a yellow stripe and dead
armadillos.
		-- Jim Hightower, Texas Agricultural Commissioner
%
There's nothing wrong with teenagers that reasoning with them won't
aggravate.
%
There's only one way to have a happy marriage and as soon as I learn
what it is I'll get married again.
		-- Clint Eastwood
%
There's so much plastic in this culture that vinyl leopard skin is
becoming an endangered synthetic.
		-- Lily Tomlin
%
"These are DARK TIMES for all mankind's HIGHEST VALUES!"
"These are DARK TIMES for FREEDOM and PROSPERITY!"
"These are GREAT TIMES to put your money on BAD GUY to kick the CRAP
out of MEGATON MAN!"
%
------------ <4> ------------
Ducharme's Precept:
	Opportunity always knocks at the least opportune moment.
%
Duct tape is like the force.  It has a light side, and a dark side, and
it holds the universe together.
		-- Carl Zwanzig
%
Due to a shortage of devoted followers, the production of great leaders
has been discontinued.
%
Due to circumstances beyond your control, you are master of your fate
and captain of your soul.
%
Due to lack of disk space, this fortune database has been
discontinued.
%
	During a grouse hunt in North Carolina two intrepid sportsmen
were blasting away at a clump of trees near a stone wall.  Suddenly a
red-faced country squire popped his head over the wall and shouted,
"Hey, you almost hit my wife."
------------ <5> ------------
	An architect's first work is apt to be spare and clean.  He
knows he doesn't know what he's doing, so he does it carefully and with
great restraint.
	As he designs the first work, frill after frill and
embellishment after embellishment occur to him.  These get stored away
to be used "next time".  Sooner or later the first system is finished,
and the architect, with firm confidence and a demonstrated mastery of
that class of systems, is ready to build a second system.
	This second is the most dangerous system a man ever designs.
When he does his third and later ones, his prior experiences will
confirm each other as to the general characteristics of such systems,
and their differences will identify those parts of his experience that
are particular and not generalizable.
	The general tendency is to over-design the second system, using
all the ideas and frills that were cautiously sidetracked on the first
one.  The result, as Ovid says, is a "big pile".
		-- Frederick Brooks, "The Mythical Man Month"
%
An artist should be fit for the best society and keep out of it.
%
------------------------------
##########[ fortune cookies/homebrew ]##########
------------ <1> ------------
You have the capacity to learn from mistakes.  You'll learn a lot today.
------------ <2> ------------
Don't get stuck in a closet -- wear yourself out.
------------ <3> ------------
You're being followed.  Cut out the hanky-panky for a few days.
------------ <4> ------------
Give your very best today.  Heaven knows it's little enough.
------------ <5> ------------
You have had a long-term stimulation relative to business.
------------------------------

@twang2218
Copy link
Author

fortune command line arguments

System and fortune arguments Matrix

System -a -c -D -e -f -i -l -m -n -o -s -u -w
Ubuntu-24-04-x64
Debian-12-x64
Arch-Linux
Fedora-41-x64
OpenSUSE-15-x64
Alpine-3
OpenBSD-7-6
FreeBSD-14
Homebrew

man fortune

Ubuntu-24-04-x64

NAME
       fortune - print a random, hopefully interesting, adage

SYNOPSIS
       fortune [-acefilosuw] [-n length] [ -m pattern] [[n%] file/dir/all]

DESCRIPTION
       When  fortune  is  run with no arguments it prints out a random epigram. Epigrams are divided into several categories, where each
       category is sub-divided into those which are potentially offensive and those which are not.

   Options
       The options are as follows:

       -a     Choose from all lists of maxims, both offensive and not.  (See the -o option for more information on offensive fortunes.)

       -c     Show the cookie file from which the fortune came.

       -e     Consider all fortune files to be of equal size (see discussion below on multiple files).

       -f     Print out the list of files which would be searched, but don't print a fortune.

       -l     Long dictums only.  See -n on how ``long'' is defined in this sense.

       -m pattern
              Print out all fortunes which match the basic regular expression pattern.  The syntax of these expressions depends  on  how
              your system defines re_comp(3) or regcomp(3), but it should nevertheless be similar to the syntax used in grep(1).

              The fortunes are output to standard output, while the names of the file from which each fortune comes are printed to standard  error.  Either or both can be redirected; if standard output is redirected to a file, the result is a valid fortunes
              database file.  If standard error is also redirected to this file, the result is still valid, but there will be  ``bogus''
              fortunes,  i.e.  the  filenames themselves, in parentheses.  This can be useful if you wish to remove the gathered matches
              from their original files, since each filename-record will precede the records from the file it names.

       -n length
              Set the longest fortune length (in characters) considered to be ``short'' (the default is 160).  All fortunes longer  than
              this  are  considered  ``long''.  Be careful!  If you set the length too short and ask for short fortunes, or too long and
              ask for long ones, fortune goes into a never-ending thrash loop.

       -o     Choose only from potentially offensive aphorisms.  The -o option is ignored if a fortune directory is specified.

              Please, please, please request a potentially offensive fortune if and only if you believe, deep in your  heart,  that  you
              are willing to be offended. (And that you'll just quit using -o rather than give us grief about it, okay?)

              ... let us keep in mind the basic governing philosophy of The Brotherhood, as handsomely summarized in these words: we believe in healthy, hearty laughter -- at the expense of the whole human race, if needs be.  Needs be.
                     --H. Allen Smith, "Rude Jokes"

       -s     Short apothegms only.  See -n on which fortunes are considered ``short''.

       -i     Ignore case for -m patterns.

       -w     Wait  before termination for an amount of time calculated from the number of characters in the message.  This is useful if
              it is executed as part of the logout procedure to guarantee that the message can be read before the screen is cleared.

       -u     Don't translate UTF-8 fortunes to the locale when searching or translating.

Debian-12-x64

NAME
       fortune - print a random, hopefully interesting, adage

SYNOPSIS
       fortune [-acefilosuw] [-n length] [ -m pattern] [[n%] file/dir/all]

DESCRIPTION
       When  fortune  is  run with no arguments it prints out a random epigram. Epigrams are divided into several categories, where each
       category is sub-divided into those which are potentially offensive and those which are not.

   Options
       The options are as follows:

       -a     Choose from all lists of maxims, both offensive and not.  (See the -o option for more information on offensive fortunes.)

       -c     Show the cookie file from which the fortune came.

       -e     Consider all fortune files to be of equal size (see discussion below on multiple files).

       -f     Print out the list of files which would be searched, but don't print a fortune.

       -l     Long dictums only.  See -n on how ``long'' is defined in this sense.

       -m pattern
              Print out all fortunes which match the basic regular expression pattern.  The syntax of these expressions depends  on  how
              your system defines re_comp(3) or regcomp(3), but it should nevertheless be similar to the syntax used in grep(1).

              The fortunes are output to standard output, while the names of the file from which each fortune comes are printed to stan-
              dard error.  Either or both can be redirected; if standard output is redirected to a file, the result is a valid  fortunes
              database  file.  If standard error is also redirected to this file, the result is still valid, but there will be ``bogus''
              fortunes, i.e. the filenames themselves, in parentheses.  This can be useful if you wish to remove  the  gathered  matches
              from their original files, since each filename-record will precede the records from the file it names.

       -n length
              Set  the longest fortune length (in characters) considered to be ``short'' (the default is 160).  All fortunes longer than
              this are considered ``long''.  Be careful!  If you set the length too short and ask for short fortunes, or  too  long  and
              ask for long ones, fortune goes into a never-ending thrash loop.

       -o     Choose only from potentially offensive aphorisms.  The -o option is ignored if a fortune directory is specified.

              Please,  please,  please  request a potentially offensive fortune if and only if you believe, deep in your heart, that you
              are willing to be offended. (And that you'll just quit using -o rather than give us grief about it, okay?)

              ... let us keep in mind the basic governing philosophy of The Brotherhood, as handsomely summarized in these words: we be-
              lieve in healthy, hearty laughter -- at the expense of the whole human race, if needs be.  Needs be.
                     --H. Allen Smith, "Rude Jokes"

       -s     Short apothegms only.  See -n on which fortunes are considered ``short''.

       -i     Ignore case for -m patterns.

       -w     Wait  before termination for an amount of time calculated from the number of characters in the message.  This is useful if
              it is executed as part of the logout procedure to guarantee that the message can be read before the screen is cleared.

       -u     Don't translate UTF-8 fortunes to the locale when searching or translating.

Arch-Linux

NAME
       fortune - print a random, hopefully interesting, adage

SYNOPSIS

                 fortune     [-acefilosw]
                    [-n length]
                    [-m pattern]
                    [[n%] file/dir/all]

DESCRIPTION
       When fortune is run with no arguments it prints out a random epigram. Epigrams are divided into several categories.

   Options
       The options are as follows:

       -a

           Choose from all lists of maxims.

       -c

           Show the cookie file from which the fortune came.

       -e

           Consider all fortune files to be of equal size (see discussion below on multiple files).

       -f

           Print out the list of files which would be searched, but don't print a fortune.

       -l

           Long dictums only. See -n on howlongis defined in this sense.

       -m pattern

           Print out all fortunes which match the basic regular expression pattern. The syntax of these expressions depends on how your
           system defines re_comp(3) or regcomp(3), but it should nevertheless be similar to the syntax used in grep(1).

           The fortunes are output to standard output, while the names of the file from which each fortune comes are printed to standard
           error. Either or both can be redirected; if standard output is redirected to a file, the result is a valid fortunes database
           file. If standard error is also redirected to this file, the result is still valid, but there will bebogusfortunes, i.e. the
           filenames themselves, in parentheses. This can be useful if you wish to remove the gathered matches from their original files,
           since each filename-record will precede the records from the file it names.

       -n length

           Set the longest fortune length (in characters) considered to beshort” (the default is 160). All fortunes longer than this are
           consideredlong”. Be careful! If you set the length too short and ask for short fortunes, or too long and ask for long ones,
           fortune goes into a never-ending thrash loop.

       -s

           Short apothegms only. See -n on which fortunes are consideredshort”.

       -i

           Ignore case for -m patterns.

       -w

           Wait before termination for an amount of time calculated from the number of characters in the message. This is useful if it is
           executed as part of the logout procedure to guarantee that the message can be read before the screen is cleared.

Fedora-41-x64

NAME
       fortune - print a random, hopefully interesting, adage

SYNOPSIS

                 fortune     [-acefilosw]
                    [-n length]
                    [-m pattern]
                    [[n%] file/dir/all]

DESCRIPTION
       When fortune is run with no arguments it prints out a random epigram. Epigrams are divided into several categories.

   Options
       The options are as follows:

       -a

           Choose from all lists of maxims.

       -c

           Show the cookie file from which the fortune came.

       -e

           Consider all fortune files to be of equal size (see discussion below on multiple files).

       -f

           Print out the list of files which would be searched, but don't print a fortune.

       -l

           Long dictums only. See -n on howlongis defined in this sense.

       -m pattern

           Print out all fortunes which match the basic regular expression pattern. The syntax of these expressions depends on how your
           system defines re_comp(3) or regcomp(3), but it should nevertheless be similar to the syntax used in grep(1).

           The fortunes are output to standard output, while the names of the file from which each fortune comes are printed to standard
           error. Either or both can be redirected; if standard output is redirected to a file, the result is a valid fortunes database
           file. If standard error is also redirected to this file, the result is still valid, but there will bebogusfortunes, i.e. the
           filenames themselves, in parentheses. This can be useful if you wish to remove the gathered matches from their original files,
           since each filename-record will precede the records from the file it names.

       -n length

           Set the longest fortune length (in characters) considered to beshort” (the default is 160). All fortunes longer than this are
           consideredlong”. Be careful! If you set the length too short and ask for short fortunes, or too long and ask for long ones,
           fortune goes into a never-ending thrash loop.

       -s

           Short apothegms only. See -n on which fortunes are consideredshort”.

       -i

           Ignore case for -m patterns.

       -w

           Wait before termination for an amount of time calculated from the number of characters in the message. This is useful if it is
           executed as part of the logout procedure to guarantee that the message can be read before the screen is cleared.

Alpine

NAME
     fortuneprint a random, hopefully interesting, adage

SYNOPSIS
     fortune [-aefilosw] [-m pattern] [[N%] file/directory/all]

DESCRIPTION
     When fortune is run with no arguments it prints out a random epigram.
     Epigrams are divided into several categories, where each category is
     subdivided into those which are potentially offensive and those which are
     not.  The options are as follows:

     -a    Choose from all lists of maxims, both offensive and not.  (See the
           -o option for more information on offensive fortunes.)

     -e    Consider all fortune files to be of equal size (see discussion
           below on multiple files).

     -f    Print out the list of files which would be searched, but don't
           print a fortune.

     -i    Ignore case for -m patterns.

     -l    Long dictums only.

     -m pattern
           Print out all fortunes which match the regular expression pattern.
           See re_format(7) for a description of patterns.

     -o    Choose only from potentially offensive aphorisms.  Please, please,
           please request a potentially offensive fortune if and only if you
           believe, deep down in your heart, that you are willing to be
           offended.  (And that if you are, you'll just quit using -o rather
           than give us grief about it, okay?)

                 ... let us keep in mind the basic governing philosophy
                 of The Brotherhood, as handsomely summarized in these words:
                 we believe in healthy, hearty laughter -- at the expense of
                 the whole human race, if needs be.  Needs be.
                           --H. Allen Smith, "Rude Jokes"

     -s    Short apothegms only.

     -w    Wait before termination for an amount of time calculated from the
           number of characters in the message.  This is useful if it is
           executed as part of the logout procedure to guarantee that the
           message can be read before the screen is cleared.

OpenSUSE-15-x64

NAME
       fortune - print a random, hopefully interesting, adage

SYNOPSIS
       fortune [-acefilosw] [-n length] [ -m pattern] [[n%] file/dir/all]

DESCRIPTION
       When  fortune  is  run with no arguments it prints out a random epigram. Epigrams are divided into several categories, where each
       category is sub-divided into those which are potentially offensive and those which are not..SS Options The options  are  as  fol-
       lows:

       -a     Choose from all lists of maxims, both offensive and not.  (See the -o option for more information on offensive fortunes.)

       -c     Show the cookie file from which the fortune came.

       -e     Consider all fortune files to be of equal size (see discussion below on multiple files).

       -f     Print out the list of files which would be searched, but don't print a fortune.

       -l     Long dictums only.  See -n on how ``long'' is defined in this sense.

       -m pattern
              Print  out  all fortunes which match the basic regular expression pattern.  The syntax of these expressions depends on how
              your system defines re_comp(3) or regcomp(3), but it should nevertheless be similar to the syntax used in grep(1).

              The fortunes are output to standard output, while the names of the file from which each fortune comes are printed to stan-
              dard  error.  Either or both can be redirected; if standard output is redirected to a file, the result is a valid fortunes
              database file.  If standard error is also redirected to this file, the result is still valid, but there will be  ``bogus''
              fortunes,  i.e.  the  filenames themselves, in parentheses.  This can be useful if you wish to remove the gathered matches
              from their original files, since each filename-record will precede the records from the file it names.

       -n length
              Set the longest fortune length (in characters) considered to be ``short'' (the default is 160).  All fortunes longer  than
              this  are  considered  ``long''.  Be careful!  If you set the length too short and ask for short fortunes, or too long and
              ask for long ones, fortune goes into a never-ending thrash loop.

       -o     Choose only from potentially offensive aphorisms.  The -o option is ignored if a fortune directory is specified.

              Please, please, please request a potentially offensive fortune if and only if you believe, deep in your  heart,  that  you
              are willing to be offended. (And that you'll just quit using -o rather than give us grief about it, okay?)

              ... let us keep in mind the basic governing philosophy of The Brotherhood, as handsomely summarized in these words: we be-
              lieve in healthy, hearty laughter -- at the expense of the whole human race, if needs be.  Needs be.
                     --H. Allen Smith, "Rude Jokes"

       -s     Short apothegms only.  See -n on which fortunes are considered ``short''.

       -i     Ignore case for -m patterns.

       -w     Wait before termination for an amount of time calculated from the number of characters in the message.  This is useful  if
              it is executed as part of the logout procedure to guarantee that the message can be read before the screen is cleared.

FreeBSD-14

NAME
     fortuneprint a random, hopefully interesting, adage

SYNOPSIS
     fortune [-aDefilosw] [-m pattern] [[N%] file/directory/all]

DESCRIPTION
     When fortune is run with no arguments it prints out a random epigram.
     Epigrams are divided into several categories, where each category is
     subdivided into those which are potentially offensive and those which are
     not.  The options are as follows:

     -a      Choose from all lists of maxims, both offensive and not.  (See
             the -o option for more information on offensive fortunes.)

     -D      Enable additional debugging output.  Specify this option multiple
             times for more verbose output.  Only available if compiled with
             -DDEBUG.

     -e      Consider all fortune files to be of equal size (see discussion
             below on multiple files).

     -f      Print out the list of files which would be searched, but do not
             print a fortune.

     -l      Long dictums only.

     -m pattern
             Print out all fortunes which match the regular expression
             pattern.  See regex(3) for a description of patterns.

     -o      Choose only from potentially offensive aphorisms.  Please,
             please, please request a potentially offensive fortune if and
             only if you believe, deep down in your heart, that you are
             willing to be offended.  (And that if you are not willing, you
             will just quit using -o rather than give us grief about it,
             okay?)

                   ... let us keep in mind the basic governing philosophy
                   of The Brotherhood, as handsomely summarized in these words:
                   we believe in healthy, hearty laughter -- at the expense of
                   the whole human race, if needs be.
                   Needs be.
                                              --H. Allen Smith, "Rude Jokes"

     -s      Short apothegms only.

     -i      Ignore case for -m patterns.

     -w      Wait before termination for an amount of time calculated from the
             number of characters in the message.  This is useful if it is
             executed as part of the logout procedure to guarantee that the
             message can be read before the screen is cleared.

OpenBSD-7-6

NAME
     fortune - print a random, hopefully interesting, adage

SYNOPSIS
     fortune [-aefilosw] [-m pattern] [[N%] file|directory|all]

DESCRIPTION
     When fortune is run with no arguments, it prints out a random epigram.
     Epigrams are divided into several categories, where each category is
     subdivided into those which are potentially offensive and those which are
     not.  The options are as follows:

     -a    Choose from all lists of maxims, both offensive and not.  (See the
           -o option for more information on offensive fortunes.)

     -e    Consider all fortune files to be of equal size (see discussion
           below on multiple files).

     -f    Print out the list of files which would be searched, but don't
           print a fortune.

     -i    Ignore case for -m patterns.

     -l    Long dictums only.

     -m pattern
           Print out all fortunes which match the regular expression pattern.
           See re_format(7) for a description of patterns.

     -o    Choose only from potentially offensive aphorisms.  Please, please,
           please request a potentially offensive fortune if and only if you
           believe, deep down in your heart, that you are willing to be
           offended.  (And that if you are, you'll just quit using -o rather
           than give us grief about it, okay?)

                 ... let us keep in mind the basic governing philosophy
                 of The Brotherhood, as handsomely summarized in these words:
                 we believe in healthy, hearty laughter -- at the expense of
                 the whole human race, if needs be.  Needs be.
                           --H. Allen Smith, "Rude Jokes"

     -s    Short apothegms only.

     -w    Wait before termination for an amount of time calculated from the
           number of characters in the message.  This is useful if it is
           executed as part of the logout procedure to guarantee that the
           message can be read before the screen is cleared.

Homebrew

NAME
       fortune - print a random, hopefully interesting, adage

SYNOPSIS
       fortune [-aefilosw] [-n length] [ -m pattern] [[n%] file/dir/all]

DESCRIPTION
       When fortune is run with no arguments it prints out a random epigram. Epigrams are divided into several categories, where each
       category is sub-divided into those which are potentially offensive and those which are not.

   Options
       The options are as follows:

       -a     Choose from all lists of maxims, both offensive and not.  (See the -o option for more information on offensive fortunes.)

       -e     Consider all fortune files to be of equal size (see discussion below on multiple files).

       -f     Print out the list of files which would be searched, but don't print a fortune.

       -l     Long dictums only.  See -n on how ``long'' is defined in this sense.

       -m pattern
              Print out all fortunes which match the basic regular expression pattern.  The syntax of these expressions depends on how
              your system defines re_comp(3) or regcomp(3), but it should nevertheless be similar to the syntax used in grep(1).

              The fortunes are output to standard output, while the names of the file from which each fortune comes are printed to
              standard error.  Either or both can be redirected; if standard output is redirected to a file, the result is a valid
              fortunes database file.  If standard error is also redirected to this file, the result is still valid, but there will be
              ``bogus'' fortunes, i.e. the filenames themselves, in parentheses.  This can be useful if you wish to remove the gathered
              matches from their original files, since each filename-record will precede the records from the file it names.

       -n length
              Set the longest fortune length (in characters) considered to be ``short'' (the default is 160).  All fortunes longer than
              this are considered ``long''.  Be careful!  If you set the length too short and ask for short fortunes, or too long and ask
              for long ones, fortune goes into a never-ending thrash loop.

       -o     Choose only from potentially offensive aphorisms.

              Please, please, please request a potentially offensive fortune if and only if you believe, deep in your heart, that you are
              willing to be offended. (And that you'll just quit using -o rather than give us grief about it, okay?)

              ... let us keep in mind the basic governing philosophy of The Brotherhood, as handsomely summarized in these words: we
              believe in healthy, hearty laughter -- at the expense of the whole human race, if needs be.  Needs be.
                     --H. Allen Smith, "Rude Jokes"

       -s     Short apothegms only.  See -n on which fortunes are considered ``short''.

       -i     Ignore case for -m patterns.

       -w     Wait before termination for an amount of time calculated from the number of characters in the message.  This is useful if it
              is executed as part of the logout procedure to guarantee that the message can be read before the screen is cleared.

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